Friday, May 26, 2006

Poor Duck!


On the way into the mall last night (to purchase more Legos (sigh)), Garrett spotted a pigeon hanging around near the mall entrance. Being a normal six year old, he roared and began chasing it so it would fly away in that satisfying, panicked pigeon sort of way. Instead, the bird ran a few steps, tried to flap one wing, and fell over. Garrett pulled up short, and clearly feeling badly for having harassed the hurt bird, said "Oh, sorry little ducky." Later, on they way out, (after Steve had explained that it was not actually a duck) Garrett said, "Wasn't that pigeon so poor?" Now if only we could get him to develop that much empathy for the cat and dog!

Monday, May 22, 2006

Birth Control

Oh my gosh. How do you go from this:
To this:in what, maybe 2 years? This is Britney Spears folks. Admired and imitated by pre-pubescent girls the world around. If this is not effective birth control, then I don't know what is.

But, don't you feel kindof sorry for her right about now? Before she married K-fed, she was held up as THE hottest female on the face of the planet. Now here she is in some skeevie diner with ratty, greasy hair, and her bra and thong hanging out. I feel bad when I look a pictures of myself that were taken TWELVE years ago before I had babies. I feel grumpy about the extra rolls around my midriff, the crows feat around my eyes, and the cellulite on my thighs. But at least I can say to myself, "Self. You are forty now (almost forty-one). Twelve years and two babies all considered, a few wrinkles, rolls, and cellulite are to be expected." Brit, on the other hand, is only twenty-four, has only had one kid, and took a meer two to three years to plummet to this level. The world is a good place when you can compare yourself to Britney Freakin' Spears and feel skinny, cute, and well-preserved.